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101 ways to do suicide in Ironic and Creative Manner

After being afraid of  Study, Un-Employment, or being cheated in Love, or Bollywood Movies like "Aashique 2",  Many people want to Commit a Suicide , but dont know "How to do that in an interesting Manner?".

This is the List of 101 ways of Whacky and Funny Ideas one may suicide.

Disclaimer: Through this post we want to tell that "Suicide or Running away is not the Solution of the Problems". Best way to solve the Problem is to Face them,



What'll you need?

  1. Courage - You'll need Courage [more than that needed to solve the problem which makes you to do a suicide]

  2. Knowledge-

    • you should know that doing Suicide is Considered as Murder in Hell as well as in every corner of the World

    • You should know that Re-Birth will happen and you have to face the  same problem again and again ,until you face it.

    • That it will hurt your friends and Family than your Enemies or " One who cheated you."

    • you should know , If you don't Commit suicide properly ,then you have to face life Worse then this, or you'll become a Ghost and have to wander till someone free you from the curse.

101 Ways to Do Suicide

  1. Charter a helicopter, hover hundreds of feet above a crowded public event, light yourself on fire, and jump.

  2. IRONIC DEATH #1. - Get really plastered, load your car with impact-triggered explosives, and drive at 110 mph into a MADD or AA meeting.

  3. Jump off the second story floor of a shopping mall.aiming your deadly plunge just right so you skewer yourself  on the nozzle of a fountain. For extra zaniness, load your  clothing with pennies.

  4. At a gas station, find the big tanks they keep the fuel in, open one, and create a spark.

  5. On the 4th of July, find the area where they launch the fireworks and lay on top of the launch tubes.

  6. Another impact explosive technique: Put a lot of it under your clothing and pick a fight with somebody.

  7. If you can, sneak onto the space shuttle launch pad and lay beneath those big-assed engines.

  8. Better yet: Strap yourself to the nose of the shuttle.If the launch doesn’t kill you, you will have a great view of the heavens before you explosively decompress in the vacuum of space.

  9. Or, even better: If you’re an astronaut, poke a hole in the hull. Everything, including you and your crew mates, will be sucked out through it, even if it is very tiny.

  10. Arrange for somebody to “accidentally” drop a grand piano on your head as you walk down the street.

  11. Ram your head through a display TV at Sears.

  12. In a science lab at school, nonchalantly turn on all the gas taps. The second somebody notices the smell, flick your Bic.

  13. Write satirical articles and stories about suicide and get them published in university papers.

  14. Aim your telescope at the sun and lay underneath the eyepiece.

  15. Join Starfleet, get a red uniform, join the crew of the original Enterprise, and go on an away mission with Kirk. Without fail, you will die in some bizarre manner.

  16. Go somewhere via AmTrak.

  17. Go somewhere via ValuJet.

  18. Get a Stealth Bomber wet and fly somewhere.

  19. Steal a stealth plane, arm its bombs, and fly it directly into the White House. How can they shoot you down if they can’t see you?
  20. Obtain large quantities of C4, and go to a Spice Girls concert. Get up on-stage. You’ll be a martyr. People will sing songs about you.
  21. Play Hendrix’s "National Anthem" at 329 decibels until your brain liquefies and trickles out of your ears like so much - ear stuff.
  22. Abandon your god and just take up snake handling.
  23. Wear a white robe and pointy hood into a Black Panthers meeting.
  24. Street hockey is out. I’m thinking  main-thourough fare-during-rush-hour hockey.
     
  25. Take everything in your medicine cabinet. Everything in your medicine cabinet.
  26.  Drive your car through the main gates of Area 51 at 90+ mph. Snap pictures.


  27. IRONIC DEATH #2. - Crush yourself with a “jaws of life.”

  28. Watch Crash whilst high. This could work really well if
    you’ve just done #25.

  29. Stop reading this and just smash your head through the
    computer monitor! Yeeee-Haaaah!!!

  30. Why wear a bomb onto the plane? There are so many more
    people in the airport...

  31. If at war, have a “sweetheart” back home, speak with a
    Texas accent, or pick up the invaluable items left sitting
    in plain sight on a table by the enemy.

  32. If alone during a killing spree, investigate every
    strange noise, take time out to have sex, fall asleep, “turn
    back around,” close the medicine cabinet, take a shower,
    trip on nothing, go up the stairs, and always, always be
    sure to open any doors that could be harboring anything from
    a knife-wielding maniac to a gelatinous amoebae from another
    world.

  33. Snitch on the mob.

  34. Snitch on the Rob.

  35. IRONIC DEATH #3. - Hang yourself. With a rosary.

  36. Douse yourself in liquid nitrogen.

  37. You know those theme park rides like the Detonator,
    where the use a hydraulic piston to launch a ring of chairs
    up a huge metal column? Chain your legs to the ground.

  38. Or undo your harness right after takeoff.

  39. Or strap an altitude-sensitive bomb to your chest.

  40. Replace your football pads with impact-sensitive
    explosives.

  41. Strap raw stakes to your body and jump into shark
    infested waters.

  42. Hold up a gunshop.

  43. Force a student who tends to write slightly off-kilter
    things to a shrink, threatening to EXPEL him from school if
    he doesn’t go.

  44. Lie in the isle of a crowded movie theater and yell
    “Fire!”

  45. Do 44, but with the added bonus of lighting yourself on
    fire first.

  46. You know those vans that deliver plate glass, where
    they have these big racks on the sides holding large panes
    of glass? Roll down your window and sideswipe one.

  47. Drink a nice, tall, frosty glass of that unnaturally
    blue water at theme park water rides.

  48. To make a political statement, burn an American flag.
    While it’s wrapped tightly around your body.

  49. Abdicate racial genocide. On BET.

  50. Be a patsy gunman for the CIA in an elaborate plot to
    assassinate the president.

  51. Be the “head” bad guy.

  52. For a pretty display to be seen for miles around, make
    your bungee cord juuuuust long enough...

  53. Draw up a declaration of war against the USA, get it
    notarized, and send it to the Pentagon.

  54. Wear one of those new invisibility suits like those
    invisible aircraft that I saw on TLC and try to cross the
    street.

  55. After all of the aliens have been killed, keep one, or
    an egg, or the DNA, and make a new race of them to use as a
    super weapon.

  56. Strap yourself to the outside of a revolving
    restaurant.

  57. Get in the car with a drunk chauffeur and get paparazzi
    to chase you at high speeds.

  58. When you get pulled over for a minor traffic violation,
    get out of your car and run screaming and flapping your arms
    at the police car.

  59. Eat Pop Rocks and drink a Coke. Remember that?

  60. Build a huge-ass neon light, seal yourself inside, and
    charge the electrodes.

  61. Write 101 lists obsessively, just asking for someone to
    end your miserable existence.

  62. Write 101 lists about suicide, when so many people are
    a wee bit “touchy” on the subject.

  63. During a thunderstorm, hold up a metal pole and curse
    God, nature, and fate.

  64. Eat burgers from Burger King.

  65. Eat chicken from Korea.

  66. Eat anything from Denny’s.

  67. IRONIC DEATH #4. - If killing yourself because of
    severe weight problem, cast yourself into giant vat of
    Olean.

  68. Pull a set of library bookshelves onto you.

  69. Put yourself in an industrial dryer.

  70. Watch Madonna’s “Ray of Light” video while high on more
    than one illegal drug.

  71. Tell your girlfriend’s military father that the only
    good thing about America is that it will pay you for doing
    exactly dick.

  72. Wake me up. Ever.

  73. Drink enough Surge until you shake so violently that
    your molecules vibrate apart and dissipate.

  74. Play jacks with those little green balls of VX gas from
    the missiles in The Rock.

  75. Go to school with gentle “boys next door” whom no one
    could ever suspect.

  76. Go to school with complete mental cases like me that
    everyone suspects.

  77. Suspect me.

  78. Walk into a biker bar and inform the denizens exactly
    what Harley Davidson can do to certain reproductive organs
    of yours.

  79. Get sent to jail and don’t put out.

  80. Join a cult led by a man who claims to be Jesus and
    then hands you an AK-47.

  81. Join a cult that claims to be leaving on a space ship
    following a comet and gives you a bang-up recipe for tapioca
    pudding.

  82. Join a cult where Kool-Aid is involved.

  83. Aw, shit, join a cult.

  84. Be the innocent little sibling of a gangsta g-funk in
    the ghetto. When someone does a driveby on your house to
    hit big bro, you’re a gonner. Never fails.

  85. Reproduce famous Hollywood blockbuster stunt scenes,
    using real explosives and bullets.

  86. Get a stalker.

  87. If three or under, get hold of plastic bags, games with
    small parts, and the “big kid” toys in Happy Meals.

  88. IRONIC DEATH #5. - Inhale a Lifesaver’s candy.

  89. Give yourself one thousand paper cuts.

  90. Hug some snakes. Yes. Hug and kiss some poisonous
    snakes.

  91. Move to Australia. If the hundreds of poisonous and
    other lethal animals don’t get you, their ozone hole will.

  92. Insult hockey to a Canadian.

  93. Insult whiskey to an Irishman.

  94. Have an affair with OJ Simpson’s wife. (I don’t care
    how old they’ve gotten - I still think OJ jokes are funny)

  95. Get dumped by a girl. They’ll not only break your
    heart, but tear it out completely, and tread upon it. And
    don’t forget about getting stabbed in the back, gut kicked,
    and having your very soul itself shredded like so much
    wholesome wheat cereal.

  96. Switch your regular coffee with decaf.

  97. Again, if an astronaut, while space-walking, push away
    and do a nose dive into the Atlantic Ocean. Or Brazil.

  98. Go on a hunger strike until the Second Coming.

  99. Do everything in your power to star in either World’s
    Scariest Police Chases or When Animals Attack 9.

  100. Do everything you can to be the star of the new Faces
    of Death video.

  101. For fun and excitement, add live land mines to any
    athletic event.